I kept thinking that I should write something intelligently eloquent this month. Something truly important. Something that might attract enough attention to merit syndication, or maybe even one of those coveted journalism awards.

The serious issues came to mind. A presidential race whose contenders are spending more millions on radio and TV ads than it would take to jumpstart real public works and employment efforts to turn around the Haitian economy.

All the while, the majority of Americans wonder if they are ready for a woman, black, Mormon, or Baptist minister president… to name just a few of the more outstanding and historic characteristics of the contenders. I thought there could be enough fodder there to craft a bit of dazzling philosophical prose.

Then I pondered more pressing issues, such as the pervasive fear of an impending recession. The nation's foremost financial experts all expound on the percentages, odds, statistics and circumstances under which it is highly probable that if things don't magically and drastically improve, there will be a recession, like "soon." While in reality the recession is already here, alive and gaining ground. And if we just get over it and accept it, we can start to strategically plan our recovery NOW, and not when it's far more advanced half a year from now.

That, I figured, was surely important, and might stir the pot a bit.

Add to that some erudite dissertations on the sub-prime mortgage fiasco, which catapulted our wise and compassionate government into rushing to figure out how they should save the banking institutions from their idiotic decisions – decisions that recklessly risked their investors' money by granting loans to people they well knew did not qualify for mortgages in the first place. How special. Perhaps a governmental fund could be established for all businesses that make stupid decisions, facilitating grants for their recovery. Brilliant, I thought, this article is a winner.

Then there is the real estate crisis (which might begin to resolve itself if the Herald didn't keep pounding it in our heads daily). I mean, anyone who thought that real estate was going to increase in value overnight every night forever, is well, stupid. Like when bidding wars were going on and singlefamily homes sold for considerable amounts over asking price in 24 hours or less; or when people stood in line to buy pre-construction condos in a building that would be completely sold out by the end of that day? Let's get real.

That was a fantasy, and it was fun. It's over and heading back to normal. When real estate professionals tell you the market is simply leveling itself, they're not giving you a ream of horse manure. It's actually true.

Now, THAT has the makings of a great article: The recession, the banking crisis, the real estate slow-down – all important and relevant stuff. And I could tie it all in at the end with the presidential race, and have one seriously awesome column going on.

But alas, no. I cannot.

How could I write about such matters when our federal legislators are weighing in on an all-important issue.

Last month, dozens of senators – democrats and republicans alike – joined hands to pressure the Bush administration to accept their urgent proposal to allow gun owners to carry firearms in national parks and wildlife refuges. I don't know about you, but if I ever wanted to carry a firearm (meaning of course a hand gun, shot gun, or even an AK-47) anywhere, and I mean anywhere, it would be to a wildlife refuge. Wouldn't you?

Let's look into the crux of this issue: what with all the problems of the nation – war, healthcare, budget cuts, the recession, the real estate crash, the sub-prime debacle, the plight of the poor and the disappearing middleclass, to name just a few – this gun thing must really rate when it trumps all in the hearts and minds of our dedicated public servants.

So I looked into it.

Back in 1983, regulations were passed stating that visitors to national parks and wildlife refuges had to render their firearms inaccessible. Meaning they could leave their loaded weapon in the trunk of their car. They didn't have to give it up, or even surrender their ammunition. They just had to stash it. Now, our concerned senators in Washington are burning the midnight oil to make sure the rights of gun owners are not infringed upon.

Now I'm sitting here wondering how the hell we are going to deal with trillions of dollars of debt, wars, national security, welfare, insurance, social security, economic stability and actual quality of life, when our politicians are working diligently to insure that someone can carry a loaded gun in a pocket instead of in a car trunk.

I mean, how important is that? Do they really have that kind of time?

Go figure, what a waste … and I wanted to write an important article.

There goes the Pulitzer.